Why My “Lucky” IVF Story Wasn’t About Luck at All

If you’ve read my journey, you’ll know that my husband and I conceived our first child through IVF. I’m the only person in my family who has undergone this process. At the time, every medical professional we met told us how fortunate we were to succeed on our very first cycle. For a while, I believed them—I truly felt lucky. But over time, as I learned more, I realised there was far more to it than luck.

For a long time, I kept our IVF story quiet. It felt like a subject people didn’t discuss openly. I let friends and family assume our pregnancy happened naturally. It was only when I began to share my experience that I discovered how many people around us had faced infertility and endured multiple, often unsuccessful, rounds of IVF. Hearing their stories made me wonder what had been different about ours.

Inside the IVF Process

I remember my husband and I sitting in a clinic room alongside eight other couples. The session was highly clinical—facts, figures, and procedures laid out in detail. We were handed forms to complete, information about possible risks, medical notes, and packs of hormones, then sent away to begin self-administering injections.

Looking back, two things stood out to me.

Firstly, the process placed almost all the focus—and pressure—on the woman. Even when fertility challenges were linked to the male partner, the medical approach still revolved around “fixing” the female body. While it’s true that women carry and give birth, conception is still a 50–50 process. Yet the responsibility felt heavily weighted on our side.

Secondly, there was no discussion of why infertility might be happening or how we could improve our chances naturally. No one mentioned diet, exercise, or environmental factors. We had simply been told that “all other options had been tried” and were quickly referred for IVF, without any review of our lifestyle.

Was It Really Luck?

I now see that my success wasn’t luck—it was the changes I made before treatment began. At the time, I was working in a high-pressure job, rarely resting, eating poorly, and not exercising at all. My environment and habits were far from healthy.

When we were referred for IVF, I overhauled my lifestyle. I stepped back from the exhausting work pace, traded nights out for yoga three times a week, walked whenever possible, added more vegetables and home-cooked meals to my diet, and started paying attention to the chemicals in my skincare and household products.

A System That’s Missing Key Support

This is not a criticism of couples going through IVF—it’s a criticism of the system itself. When people are facing infertility, emotions run high—grief, shame, anger, desperation, and a sense of injustice can all take hold. In such a vulnerable state, it’s natural to see IVF as the only remaining hope. But without addressing the bigger picture, IVF can give a false sense of certainty.

Lifestyle matters, yet it’s rarely discussed as part of the treatment pathway. You might know people with unhealthy habits who conceive easily, but we all respond differently to environmental and physical stressors. Genetics, health history, and life experiences all play a role—meaning two people living in seemingly identical ways can still have very different fertility outcomes.

What I Do Now

Today, I work with couples to help them conceive naturally. Lifestyle adjustments form a major part of this process, alongside homeopathic treatment, which has been shown to support fertility in many clinical cases.

My experience taught me that there’s so much more to conception than a medical procedure. For many, taking the time to improve health, reduce stress, and rebalance the body can make all the difference—whether IVF is part of the journey or not.

Originally authored by Sapna Matharu, adapted with permission for Homeopathy247.com.